Dance Recital

Pretty much the cutest dancers and choreography I've ever seen. 

No One

No One in my house:

Lost the bottom of the camping lantern when the power went off

Broke a vase from my wedding

Always eats all the cereal

Left dirty dishes in the office, not once, not twice, but 10 gazillion times

Took the zit cream from my bathroom

Returned the zit cream to the wrong place

Misplaced Claire's ballet shoes

Lost the H to the alphabet sound toy

Ate the food that spilled on the rug that kids are forbidden to eat on

Keeps eating the chocolate chips

Drew on the bench

Scratched the desk

Ate the rest of the Goldfish

Made any of the messes

Antique Dorks

In order to make sure I don't forget, I have to take a few moments to write down this story.  I went to an antique store with a couple of friends yesterday, and we had a laugh over an old framed daguerreotype (probably circa mid 1800's) which looked something like this (thanks to my photoshopping skills):

My friend made the observation that it was probably the only photograph this man would have in his lifetime and, as luck would have it, his eyes were crossed.  Ok, it was more likely a genetic thing going on with his eyes, but it makes a better story to think that during his once-in-a-lifetime photographic moment he made a dumb face.  Puts your bad middle school picture into perspective, doesn't it?


So then my friend is reminded of an ancestor's picture with a story behind it.  Evidently, the man refused to pose for a photograph his whole life, so when he died, someone drew eyes on his eyelids and THAT'S how he's represented for generations since.  I imagine (again, thanks to my photoshopping skills) that it looks something like this (and if I ever get a copy of the actual photograph, I'll be uploading it for posterity):

I'll assume you're intelligent enough to figure out what the moral of the story is.

You know those origami fortune tellers you used to make out of the program every week at church?  I found one Brooke made out of a worksheet she had in class.  

 Makes me think of a quote: "You have a dark gift, Sarah Baker"

Poopy Towel: The Sequel

I had hoped that the Poopy Towel incident would've been a one-time occurrence.  Then I found this:

(although I suppose this one should've been number one, and the poopy towel should've been the sequel, if you know what I'm saying)

Don't ask me why the person in the picture has both boobs AND a beard.  I don't know why and I would never venture that far into the psyche of the artist without leaving a trail of breadcrumbs.

Bevans Tribune 2012 edition

Stuff Happens - Other than Broken Appliances!

  

 We’re thrilled to report that no more than two major repairs were needed at the Bevans household in 2012.  Newer replacements from 2011 were credited for the dramatic decrease. 

   In business news, Todd usually enjoys being an attorney, although the occasional crazy client can be taxing. 

  Todd and Alli are enjoying Friday date night dance lessons.  Todd is, surprisingly light on his feet, and quite a swell dancer.  So is Alli (not surprising).  They are anxious to keep older kids from having a life lest they have to start finding sitters again.

   Sophie is wrapping up the final quarter of her first year as a teenager. Her mother and father have mixed feelings about this whole teenager thing.  They are apprehensive as two more sisters are hot on her high heels.

   Janelle and Brooke are enjoying the glorious age of 11 when they are still free of the restrictive self-consciousness that comes with adolescent hormones.  Lack of self-consciousness is wonderful for the two of them, but at times embarrasses their older (“restricted”) sister.  It also prompts them to ask for things like umbrella hats for Christmas.

   Sassy and independent, Claire is busy making her mark on everything she comes across.  She is excelling in school and reading like an old pro, complete with passionate inflection – she can’t help herself, she’s a passionate girl.  Which may explain why she allegedly punched a boy in class for trying to look at her paper (details are still a little fuzzy).

   As the baby of the family, Eden pretty much gets away with everything.  When asked what her chore is (as everyone else is sweeping or doing dishes or something) she always answers “to being cute!”

An Interview with Eden

Who is the most beautiful person in the world?

Me

Who are you going to marry?

Dopey [Sophie]

Where are you going to get married?

In the bathroom.

Why do you want to get married in the bathroom?

Because the grass is wet.

What’s your favorite food?

Soup.

Can you tell me a funny joke?

Knock, knock

Who’s there?

Banana head.

Banana head who?

Someone pooped on your head!

 

Personals

SWF, age 13, seeks member(s) of One Direction for possible long-term commitment.  Enjoys sunsets and long walks on the beach.  Is willing to put up with long-distance relationship while band is touring

Claire’s Classifieds

300 paper fans for sale.  50 cents apiece.  Buy any amount or all of them.  They’re really amazing paper fans.

 Comics - by Janelle and Brooke:

On Sluts and DooDoo

I get the pleasure of helping out in Claire's first grade classroom every week.  Some weeks I'm busy and wish I could edit it out of my day's to do list, but afterward I'm always glad that I went.  Today was particularly rewarding. 

The kids were just working on silent reading, so I helped a couple of them individually.  The first little guy whipped through his Venus book in no time, so I went to help another little boy.  He chose a book on bats.  He clearly needed the extra help and attention as he struggled with simple words, sometimes flip flopping the sounds.  There were several "igh" words that were tricky for him as well.  After reading a page or two, he came across a word he'd worked through before and to his utter delight he remembered it!  I loved seeing him get excited when he figured something out and it was correct.  Those are the moments teachers live for, and I'm happy to have been given a small taste. 

After working out the word "do", he exclaimed, "Hey!  Now I know how to spell doodoo!" 

"That's super!" I told him.  "Now when you get home you can tell your mom when she asks you what you learned at school today that you learned how to spell doodoo!"

"My mom lives far away," he told me matter-of-factly. 

"Oh, ok.  Well you can tell your dad then."

"Um, my dad sleeps a lot...[insert sound of my heart breaking]...but I'll tell my grandma."

Sweet boy - can't I just take him home with me??  Why do there have to be so many darned laws?

A page or so later he was working out the word "sleep".

"sl...sl....slut?" he guessed.

"Uh....no....see there's no uh sound or t sound.  See, say it with me, sl...eeee....p."

"Oh!  Sleep!"

"Yes!  And just so you know, 'slut' isn't actually a very nice word.  It's a mean thing to call another person." and you'll probably never come across it in first grade unless in the form of graffiti. 

He read for about 5 more minutes until the time was up.  Then he looked at me very open and honestly. "I didn't know 'slut' was a bad word," he explained.

I think I made it to my car before I got a little teary.  Why, again, can't I just keep him?